What can you do when things are about to blow? Here are some thoughts on working with anger – or any other strong emotion – with mindfulness.

We’ve never had to defuse a real bomb but we’ve probably had our moments with metaphorical ones: the times when you feel you are about to blow. That’s when we need emotional bomb disposal skills, and find we can’t access them. We all know the theory: it’s good to keep your head in a crisis; yelling at people winds them up and doesn’t achieve what we want; patience and tolerance are important qualities … But when it comes to the heat of the moment we lose it and our good intentions vanish. The gall rises, the clock ticks … kaboom!

The key is remembering, or rather, remembering to remember. Usually, our focus is on the unacceptable thing that has just happened that has provoked our anger and things go wrong when we just act on that without pausing to notice what’s really happening or consider our response. Paying attention to our responses can eventually become a habit, but to start with we need simple things we can do in the moment. Firstly, it helps to place your attention on something that has a calming effect. That’s where the breath comes in. The generations of mums who told their children to take a breath and count to ten knew what they were doing. For most people, the breath – especially the out breath – tends to be calming and reassuring. Paying attention to the breath in this way also takes our attention away from the thoughts that are screaming in our heads, giving us the all-important distance and space we need.

In that space it’s possible to remember mindfulness. Like someone defusing a real bomb, you need to stop rather than just acting out the emotion that’s in you.  We aren’t very good at doing two things at the same time, so it’s hard to both feel angry and at the same time to stand back from our anger, observing and exploring it. Just paying attention to feelings of anger tends to diffuse them.

But mindfulness isn’t just a calming device: it means exploring what’s happening in all its dimensions. So, take a breath to create some space and then ask yourself: what am I looking at? You will probably notice that a whole array of sensations come together to comprise the experience we call ‘anger. There are feelings: irritation, distress, the urgent need to defend oneself. There are thoughts: ‘This isn’t acceptable’, ‘I’m not standing for this!’ ‘Just who do they think I am?’ There are feelings of anger and perhaps frustration and upset just beneath them. And if you stop for a moment you may notice that there are also intense bodily sensations: tightness in the stomach that keeps bubbling up into an impulse to move and act. Pay some attention and there’s a whole volcano down there! Then there’s the situation itself. What has just happened and what it means to me. There’s what the other person said, what I bring to it myself, and the meaning I make out of it.

It is helpful to distinguish feelings, thoughts and sensations because they express different needs. The thoughts about the situation may be true and they may be untrue – they probably need some reflection. But even when they are accurate, it helps to separate them from the feelings underlying them. When you need to make a point to someone, it can undermine you if you are feeling upset and haven’t fully acknowledged that. So acknowledge to yourself the painfulness of what has happened, breathe with them and give them some space.

Whatever we are feeling, our emotions often manifest in the body, which is why our stomachs churn when we are upset, our shoulders tighten when we are stressed and our jaws clench when we feel determined. Those are typical responses, at any rate, and each of us experiences emotions in our own ways. Not everyone experiences emotions in this way, but if you do, you have a remarkable ally in bringing awareness to what you feel. Our emotions express the impact of things that are important to us, and it isn’t enough to decide consciously to push them down. Noticing the bodily manifestation of those feelings is an excellent way of paying them attention without identifying with them or being bowled along by them.

These are essential bomb-disposal skills that we all need. Mindfulness doesn’t mean that you don’t speak out, but it might help you say the important thing that will really get through to the other person. It also doesn’t mean that you don’t get upset, though it might mean that you develop a wider perspective on those feelings. Above all, it means that when difficult things happen we have access to all the wisdom and understanding we have developed in our lives and the skills to apply it, whatever is happening.

You can participate live on as many calls as you like or listen to the recordings later at your convenience.

Don’t miss this opportunity to join world renowned spiritual luminaries, authors and teachers for a life-changing inquiry into humanity’s deepest longing!

The Future of Love

“I love you.”

Consider the impact that these words – spoken in the right place, at the right time, by the right person, in the right way – have had on your life. In our time, so many of the old words of the sacred have lost their capacity to move us, dethroned by the rigorous critiques of modernity and post modernity. But the authentic expression of love always holds a radical power to touch and even transform our lives.

We sometimes wait our whole lives to hear “I love you” spoken with total authenticity. 

We may wait even longer to be able to say it. But to hear or speak these words sincerely is a complete affirmation of all that is sacred. For many of us today, the words ‘love’ and ‘meaning’ are virtually indistinguishable.  

Yet, what do we mean by “love”? Is love simply the tender feeling you have for a friend or a relative, a lover or a spouse? Or is there something more profound about love’s meaning, something that accounts for its power to transform a life, in every way?

During this remarkable series of teleseminars,
we explore questions such as:

~ Which skills and principles of Integral Love can immediately raise your level of consciousness, and transform your relationships?
~ How does the dance of the Integral feminine and the Integral masculine affect almost every facet of your life?
~ Why is love the most crucial ingredient in effective shadow work, which we engage in to heal the unresolved emotional trauma of our past?
~ How does love impact the evolution of consciousness in the life of an individual and the life of a community?
~ How is love impacted by the level of consciousness of the lover and the beloved?
~ What is the relationship between love and spiritual enlightenment?
~ What new gifts for the world can and must emerge from this radical inquiry into the nature of love?

Spirit’s Next Move 

Join 14 of the San Francisco Bay Area’s most cutting edge spiritual teachers and leaders!

It is clear that the time for the emergence of Spirit’s next step is now, and that the emergence of a World Spirituality is an evolutionary step in human history.

This FREE online teleseminar series brings together leading edge integral thinkers, teachers, and scholars from all the great traditions to chart the principles and practices of a sustainable World Spirituality.

Inspiring Women Summit

Featuring dialogues with some of today’s most talented, inspiring and fabulous women. 

The 8-day program explores many facets of being an inspired woman including: feminine leadership, women’s health, communication, relationships, manifestation skills, sensuality, community organizing, spirituality and much more. Panel dialogues will focus on questions of importance to women, which will then seed your conversation with other participants.

Hope you make the most of this wisdom,

Mita  x

Are you part of the Shift?

Let’s accelerate the next evolution!The Shift Network empowers a global movement of people who are creating an evolutionary shift of consciousness that in turn leads to a more enlightened society, one built on principles of sustainability, peace, health, and prosperity. Now is the time for an upgrade to our planetary operating system. If you are part of this Shift, please join us!

If you are interested in free events, paid courses and products that enrich your life and expand your horizon then check out The Shift Network by clicking the following link.

https://shiftnetwork.infusionsoft.com/go/tsn/mitashah/

Wishing you inspiration on your Journey of Awakening,
Mita

Have you lost a sense of your personal power lately? How many of you could use some NEW tools and techniques to reclaim your power?

I’m so pleased and delighted to share with you a free and exciting event that’s just started. It’s the third season of the The Aware Show teleseminar series… Tools To Reclaim Your Power.

Each guest on The Aware Show Teleseminar Series is either a best-selling author or new thought leader in their own right, but how do you think they came up with the tools they use to get them through challenging times and rise to the top of their field? You can get first hand access to the tools and techniques that some of the greatest minds in the human potential movement use in their own lives on a daily basis. How many of you could use some new techniques to reclaim your power?

The series is produced by renowned host of The Aware Show, Lisa Garr who has interviewed the most established leaders in the human potential movement. She is now bringing her connections, insights and remarkable interview skills to a new interactive forum where you can question and converse with the best of the best. You’ll appreciate her engaging and enthusiastic interview style.

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Lisa will be interviewing me twenty four experts about “Tools To Reclaim Your Power”. Quite often, as we face our own challenges in life, we slowly lose our own sense of self-worth and we wind up operating with half of the energy we need in order to be happy, make quick decisions, and deal with life. This process often happens without our awareness until it’s too late. Would you like to know how to reclaim your power that might have been lost?

Joining Lisa will be guests who will be sharing their tools and techniques to reclaim your personal power so you can learn and be able to immediately apply new techniques to manage your life to its fullest potential

Here is a sampling of the amazing experts who will be a part of this series…

Wayne Dyer

Wayne Dyer is one of the most popular best-selling authors and Lecturers on spiritually motivational topics. With over 30 books, many audio programs, and videos. Wayne has also delivered his inspiring message on thousands of television and radio shows.

Caroline Myss

Caroline Myss has been in the field of energy medicine and human consciousness for 20 years. Since 1982, she has worked as a medical intuitive, providing individuals with an evaluation of the health of their energetic anatomy system. She specializes in assisting people in understanding the emotional, psychological, and physical reasons why their bodies have developed an illness.

Lisa Nichols

Lisa Nichols is a dynamic international motivational speaker and powerful advocate of personal empowerment. She is the Founder and CEO of Motivating the Teen Spirit, which is recognized by many as one of the most comprehensive empowerment skills programs available today for teen self-development.

Peggy McColl

Peggy McColl is a New York Times Best Selling Author and an internationally recognized expert in the area of goal achievement AND an expert in helping experts create products, make money online and create “best sellers”! With her goal achievement seminars, speaking engagements and books she has been inspiring individuals, professional athletes and organizations to realize their goals and reach their maximum potential for the past twenty-five years. Her purpose is to make a positive contribution to the lives of millions!

Judith Orloff

Judith is the author of the new bestseller “Second Sight: An Intuitive Psychiatrist Tells Her Own Extraordinary Story And Shows You How To Tap Your Own Inner Wisdom”. She is a psychiatrist, intuitive, and New York Times Bestselling author who offers traditional medicine with intuition, spirituality and energy medicine.

There are 24 speakers in all including: Michael Beckwith, Marci Shimoff, Yvonne Oswald, Hans King, Sheila Stewart, Joe Nunziata, David Wolfe, Bernie Siegel, Maryam Webster, Joan Borysenko, Alison Armstrong, Chris Howard, Gay & Kathlyn Hendricks, Michael Tamura, Les Brown, and more.

The first call was on Wednesday, February 10th, 2010 at 6:00 PM Eastern (5:00 PM Central, 3:00 PM Pacific).

I know you will enjoy connecting with this amazing group and it’s free.

Take advantage of this invitation to interact with these personal development experts right now. Click on this link to register for your free seat…

    http://www.1shoppingcart.com/app/?Clk=3560020

After you register, keep an eye out for Lisa’s email with the details for listening in on the calls.

Also, be sure to click on the special link in Lisa’s email and grab your bonus gifts that you can use right away. They are yours just for enrolling in this free series.

Wishing you empowerment,
Mita

P.S. Also, if you can’t make the LIVE calls, they will be recorded and available after each show for a limited time so you won’t miss a thing. We’ll send you the web address of the recording as soon as it’s posted on our website. So join us now…

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