When a drama happens, there are three sets of people. One is the audience, another is the actors, yet another are those who make the play happen, such as the director and the stage designers. Out of these sets of people, the director understands the drama better and is more involved than anyone else. Because he has conceived the drama, he has created it, and he is making it happen, the director’s involvement is tremendous. The actors know only their own roles really well – they may not be aware of the rest of the drama. The audience does not know any of that. They will go through the emotions that occur in the drama and more.
When the drama is on, the ones who are most deceived are the audience, because after some time, their tangle becomes such that they start believing it is all real. For them, the drama plays out on a psychological level. They will laugh; they will cry; they will react in different ways. The audience is least involved but most entangled. Their entanglement is greatest because of the way they are going through the drama. The actors may play one role today, another one tomorrow – they are involved but less entangled. The director is most involved but least entangled. He conducts the drama but remains untouched by it.
These are the opportunities you have in your life – it is anyway a drama. You can be an actor. You can be an audience member who is totally absorbed by the drama. Or you can be a director, the one who is creating the play. Or, if you do not have so much staff and audience, you can do all the three. But only if the director part of you is alive, your drama will go the way you want it to go – otherwise it will become an endless, out-of-control drama.
As for your external drama, you cannot direct it one hundred percent. You may not have very obedient actors who go by your script. Right now, when the outside drama does not happen the way you think it should, the next level of drama – your psychological drama – starts going out of control. That is why you should become the sole director of your psychological drama. The outside drama plays out in its own way.
Every one of us has their own external drama going on. Not all of it goes exactly the way you want it, but your psychological drama should happen one hundred percent your way. If your psychological drama stays on track, outside situations will fall into place. When everything is pleasant, going well, it is time to realize it is all a drama and to conduct it well. Otherwise, if you have no control over the script, the drama will turn ugly at some point, one way or the other – either with misbehavior, disease, death, or some other calamity.
Do not wait for it to turn ugly. Take charge of your psychological drama now. Within yourself, your own actors must listen to you. If you manage this, the spiritual process becomes effortless. As long as you let the outside drama impact the psychological drama, you cannot turn spiritual. Turning spiritual means turning inward. No one can stop you from turning inward. You just need to make sure you play the external drama efficiently. If you sit in meditation all the time, your husband or wife will wonder what this new drama is. If they do not like it, they will do another kind of drama to distract you.
No one needs to know that you have turned inward. Not because it is a secret – because it is no one else’s business. With your spouse, your family, and society, you can play the drama fifty percent the way they want – fifty percent the way you want. Your psychological drama should be one hundred percent your way. The same holds for the spiritual reality – it should be one hundred percent your way. Only on the outside, you can make compromises, fifty percent of the time. But your psychological drama and your inner situation should be one hundred percent yours.